Brae, a fatal flaw, and the things you lose along the way 8ˆ{

I arrived in Lerwick bright and early this morning, having spent the night in a "pod", where I predicted a sleepless night for your informant. 

However, sometimes we are pleasantly surprised. It was a lot more pleasant in Pod Lounge 3 than it was in the public areas of the ship because the temperature was cooler and more conducive to sleep. I just put on the NorthLink Ferries mask, covered myself from head to toe with the provided blanket, and nodded off, thankful that the old guy in front, who'd shown signs of being an open-mouth sleeper and incipient signs of snoring, went away somewhere. 

There were only 5 or 6 people in the whole lounge and there were maybe 30 pods. No-one was in a pod very close to me, and really, it was a surprisingly good way to spend 7 or so hours. (That is, if I didn’t catch COVID from one of the other people breathing my air.)

Today, having navigated a very tricky exit from the hold of the ferry in my big orange car,

 

 

I drove out of the ferry terminal, deciding that I would look for Jimmy Perez’ house immediately because I had no idea where the guest house was, in which I would stay for the next 7 nights. I found the DI’s house straightaway, and the police station. 

 

 I was frightened of trying to wrestle with the Citroen’s Satnav again. (She is almost as useless at directions and is your informant. She doesn’t even understand the British postcodes. Siri does.) Sometimes the Citroen’s Satnav (hereafter “CS”) gets sniffy and won’t let Siri’s voice use the sound system to guide me, so it’s hard to hear Siri’s directions and I can’t see them on the screen. Sometimes CS and Siri compete to give me the same directions. 

 

Well, today, CS didn’t have a fucking clue where I wanted to go, and Siri sent me miles and miles out of my way down single lane roads with bumps in them, to allow traffic to pass in the opposite direction. It was scary. But back to my morning adventure. 

 

So, drove out of the ferry terminal, terrified that I was going to scrape the sides of the hold and collect one of the wee men giving the instructions; drove around a bit, found parking and then found the Jimmy Perez’s house and spent a lovely couple of hours taking photos of the beautiful old granite buildings in Lerwick. Then decided it was time to confront the Satnavs and find the Valleyfield Guest House. 

And here, again, is the fatal flaw. Couldn’t remember where I parked the car! and did not, as Elizabeth has advised me to do, take a photo of the location. I was wandering around, lost, and a kind lady, Eileen, asked me if there was anything wrong. I told her my predicament and she said she could drive me around for a wee while to look for it. Well, that didn’t pan out because I had a completely different memory of where I had parked the car to where I (with the godsent help of Brian) finally found it. 

 

I told Eileen that I didn’t want to take up more of her time and cause her more trouble and asked her if she’d drop me at the police station. With the details of the parking spot that I remembered (although these were minutiae and not helpful in finding the location unless someone present has more local knowledge) I thought the police might be able to solve the case.

 

I remembered that I parked at a 90-degree angle to the kerb. (There are a limited number of parking places like this in Lerwick because the streets are so narrow.) I remembered the street was very wide. (This was a false memory. It wasn’t.) I remembered that the parking space next to where I parked the car was for EV charging. (There are few of these chargers in Lerwick.) I remembered that the walk to Jimmy Perez’s house was very quick.) 

 

Back to Eileen. She dropped me at the police station. I went in. It looked deserted. There was a sign to ring the bell ONCE! If the office is unattended. I rang. And I sat and waited for about ten minutes and then I thought, well, I’ll just try once more. I hope they don’t arrest me for troublemaking. I waited another five or ten minutes and no-one came, so I thought I’d ring a taxi company to drive me around to look for the car. Then I realised I couldn’t see the numbers on the screen. Why? Because the second spare pair of glasses that I’d been holding in Eileen’s car, I let slip from my grasp. 

 

Just then a policewoman came to the counter. I explained the situation to her. She asked a few questions about streets, etc., that I was useless at answering. (In my defence, there are very few street names marked in Lerwick.) Then she just disappeared again without saying where she was going. She was out for another 10 minutes or so it seemed. And I sat down again, with my now useless phone. Finally, she came back and said that her colleague was going to go out in the van and he could drive me around to see if I remembered anything. (That was a futile hope, if “anything” meant something related to spacial coordinates.)

 

Got into the van with the officer—Brian, from Glasgow originally--and told him the minutiae I’d carefully noted when I failed to note the location of the parking spot. He drove me around. I showed him a photo of the car. He asked me if I remembered going here? There? Finally, Brian got a brainwave. He rounded a corner and there was the big orange Citroen, waiting where I’d left i 

Then, I popped into a bookshop in town, bought some reading glasses (strength 2.5) and finally arrived here at Valleyfield Guest House & Chalets, in a journey that took more than twice the time it should have, partly, I think, because the address on AirBnB is Brae, but it's not, in fact, right in Brae. Brae is about five minutes down the road. 

 

The door to the guest house was open but there was no-one around. I went inside and tried to ring Marina, the proprietor, but I had no reception. I went outside and was able to call. Left a message at one number and got a message that I had dialled the wrong number at the second number. Marina returned the call while I was outside, so that was a lucky break. Otherwise, I wouldn’t have got the call. She told me I was in room 3, that everything was open, to make myself at home, and that she’d see me tonight.

 

I did get a pleasant surprise, though. I had thought that I would have to share a bathroom, but my room, room 3, has its own ensuite. When I found the accommodation, it was the only bed available on-line, on the whole island, so I booked a room with shared bathroom. I guess because I'm staying a week, Marina juggled other bookings and gave me an ensuite room.